Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
