I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Randomize
