actually, I'm a sock model
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Randomize
