Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
