I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
40s are totally the cure
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
