Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Randomize
