So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I just forgot I was standing up.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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