see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
