I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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