Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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