Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize