from now on my penis is your penis
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
