told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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