Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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