Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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