Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
