Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
