3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
if i died would you start the facebook group?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
