why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
