I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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