I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
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