it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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