Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
