Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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