Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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