You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
