Kiss
Puke
I'm jealous of your bromance
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
why do cheetos always look like penises
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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