I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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