Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
