jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Come on in and take your pants off
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