My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
you made out with another girl for some wings
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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