did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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