2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
