HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Sext me about skeletons
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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