What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
