Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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