she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Randomize
