ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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