hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
