So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
