I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
17 year olds will be the death of me.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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