Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
