WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
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