i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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