so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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