Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
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