I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
