She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
