I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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