we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
