Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
